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It's Always Nice To Get Positive Press

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Why is it, the people you like never seem to like you back? I mean I know a lot of people. I've had my fair share of boyfriends, I don't mean to sound bigheaded btw, and I know I'm very fortunate. The thing is, there's always been one or two lads I know that I've secretly liked, but feared too much to tell in case it ruined our friendships. Argh, I'm babbling, I'll post more on this thought a bit later.

Peace Out *salutes*

Current Location:
At Home
Current Mood:
cranky cranky
Current Music:
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*Rages* Just ignore me...

Stupid Kevin! Thanks to him we're now a member down for our Radio unit because he's dropped out of college. This means it's just me and another girl working on the project and everyone else has four or three people working with them. Not only that but he contributed nothing to the work last time so her said he'd type out the script although knowing full well that he wouldn't be there for that lesson!!!!! ARGH!!!!And we didn't!! Add that I just found out - The day before the lesson and can't get in contact with my other group member and I'm officially having a meltdown. But let's not forget, it's okay because he posted a bulletion on MySpace - so that makes it alright...And I only saw it because a friend sent me the link to his stupid message! Thanks a friggin' lot Kevin! If I EVER see that boy again I am going to kick him into next week SO HARD he won't know what's hit him!! And then I'll lynch him and then hang, draw and quarter hikm for good measure, right after I get my scottish mafia who are like Grant and Phil- 'cept they have more hair, 'ent fat and wear kilts on him for being a twatmonkey!

*Seethes* Goddamnit where is the smiley that has flames on it when you need it?!

...And I'm done...
Current Mood:
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Ahhhhh, I have a work experience interview on the 7th Aril 2006 at 11am with 'Luton at Large''s edition, Ian Abraham! Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Current Mood:
excited oooooh!
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I emailed someone earlier today. I don't know if it was a smart move or not. More than anything, I feel stupid right now. Really stupid. So I emailed him, and I asked him if he wanted to come over in half term and hang out. I don't even know how he feels anymore, but I have to try right? Even if I've been down this road before, I think this time I do really, really want it, want this - want him.

Since I did break up with him, I've regretted it. Maybe I'm only now realising what a great guy I did actually have. All I know is, I didn't give him his worth, and I should of treated him better.

My two closest friends that I've told about this have different opinions. One says you can only try, the other isn't sure if it's a good idea, but they want me to be happy.

But is it worth it. I know this time round I'll be a bloody saint and do everything in my power to make it work, not that it wasn't working out last time.

And if anyone is wondering about Andrew, I'll be honest, I'm not that into him. And sure, he's sweet and lovely, but the closer I've got to him, he's not what I look for in a partner. He'd do my head in if we did try, and I've put a distance between us and not been flirty. I know he's got the general jist, because Ben came and asked me.

I know I really want this. I know that I haven't been able to get him out of my head since and I know that I've tried to ignore these feelings for god knows how many months and that I've been battling it out with myself. I have to remember though that as much as I like him, I can't force him - and I wouldn't, although I can try my damndest to convince him lol! But if he doesn't want it, he doesn't - and they'll be nothing that I can do .I think, I at least owe it to him to tell him how I feel, because if there is some small chance that he does want me back...I know that if I found out he does still have feelings for me, and I never told him I would kick myself forever because I'd never know if it would have worked out. I can only learn from this in the end, either way...

I know I'll be extremely blessed if this works out, and I'll be grateful 'til the end of my days - I know that much.

What am I babbling about though. I may still carry a torch, but at the end of the day, if he doesn't none of the above or my feelings mean anything as it is. All I can do is wait and see I guess...
Current Mood:
contemplative Contemplative
Current Music:
Pussycat Dolls - StickWitU
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Step 1: Put your MP3 player or whatever on random.
Step 2: Post the first line from the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song.
Step 3: Post and let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from.
Step 4: Bold out the songs when someone guesses correctly.
Step 5: Looking them up on Google or any other search engine is CHEATING!

1. Any time at all, any time at all! Any time at all, all you gotta do is call, and I'll be there
2. Are you blind? Blind to me trying to be kind?
3. I'm through, thinking of things to say to you, it's true, I've said enough and so have you
4. For I have got, another girl, another girl!
5. I am just one man, with just one pair of eyes
6. I, I'm driving black on black, just got my license back
7. Brava, Brava - Bravisimo! Christine, christine...Christine...
8. On the field I remember you were incredible
9. You tell me that you've got everything you want, and your bird can sing
10. I give her all my love, that's all I do
11. Come back my darling one, I'm calling on you
12. Nothing unusual, nothing strange, close to nothing at all
13. She smokes like an amethyst, moving her way through my skin
14. Somebody hit the lights, so we can rock it day and night
15. When there's nowhere else to run, is there room for one more son?
16. Once more I'll say goodbye to you
17. It happens every time, you're giving me the sign
18. All the things she said, all the things she said
19. You're answering questions, that have not yet been asked
20. I come to you when you least expect

Hehe good luck!
Current Mood:
hyper Heeeeeeheeee
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Check it!

Hair colour before:

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Very dark...

Hair colour after:

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Woooo! It's two shades lighter with thin blonde highlights dotted here and there. Am gonna go blonder gradully over time, getting more put in each time I go for my recolour. Am so pleased with it. Gave me a good self esteem boot too! Hehe =)

Current Mood:
content content
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I feel like a failure. Scatch that. I AM a faliure. I'll never finish college. I'll never be a journalist. I'll never be the daughter my parents dream of and I'll never be a worthy friend. I'll never be what I want to be. So why bother?
Current Mood:
stressed ....
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My dad came home to get his mail when she wasn't here, she's so self righteous
And I quote: "He doesn't live here anymore and I don't want him in the house. He should come for his things when I'M HERE!"

When she is so friggin' aggressive and negative, no wonder he doesn't want to come in case she flies off the handle and attacks him again

I try and offer another point of view by saying, "With you like this it's no wonder he doesn't come. He has a right, he owns this house too,". She was all "No it's MY house - bitch bitch bitch"

I saw him yesterday and it was lovely but she was so pissy with me when I got home because I'd spent time with him, although she wouldn't admit it -I know that's why

I mentioned what I wanted to do for my birthday and how I really wanted to spend it with them both, being my 18th n all and go out for a meal with all the family

A bit much maybe, but he's willing to do it but her...she's being so selfish

She won't even consider it, not even for me, for one day, a couple of hours even

I wanted to do something in London in the big TopShop, something I've always wanted to do and I don't want just one parent there

But at the rate this is going

I'll have to have HER there because she'll NEVER FORGIVE ME -although I'd rather be with my dad on the day if she's got this kind of attitude *seethes*
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